8 Abuses of Social media

1. Bitching - Most widely used. People who do not open their mouth in real life can be as vocal (duh!) as they dream to be. The fun part is that person A can bitch about person B to person C and persons D, E, F, G, 1, 2, 3, @, %, ^ can all join and start bitching about persons M, N, O, P, ), (, *, &, etc. and persons x, y, z can ask some random people to go f**k themselves for killing Siberian Blue Panthers
2. Warning - Widely used. The best source of advice on why you should not cross your legs while sleeping, why you should never eat samosas with chai, why you should never wash your hair in the morning, etc. etc. etc. Also warning on drugs that are banned in the US and freely available in India. And what KFC puts in their chicken - do you know they actually kill the chicken before they fry? Damn those b***ards!
3. Charity - Heavily used. Facebook will pay 1$ for each fwd of this message to the man who lost both his head and tailbone trying to hold on watching a recent Dileep movie. Oh and that cute little two year old baby who needs blood for her surgery still needs blood. Even though she is the mother of a two year old now. Turns out that she is a vampire!
4. Selfies - Isn't that the reason for having facebook? Like a book of faces? Selfies come in all forms and can beat your wildest imagination. While conducting a well-orchestrated burglary, on scenes of accidents, with his grandfather's dead body (oh yes!), while on shopping, while in the toilet (you don’t believe me, do you?), in school, in college, at work, and where not.
5. Product or service reviews- Widely used. Do you know that airtel is the worst mobile service provider? Vodafone is your best bet. Don’t even think about Aircel. Reliance has a simple issue - reliability. Idea is pathetic, BSNL does not even exist. Actually you should go for airtel, which is the best. Or better, you go for aircel or Reliance. But never for Vodafone.
6. Movie reviews - Widely used. From fans, its more or less like a dog's diary. Today I played fetch with my master - best day of my life. Today I played in the pool with my master - best day of my life. Today I got a bubble bath from my master - best day of my life. From fans of other stars, it is like a cat's diary - Today, the man was so disgustingly dressed that I puked in his carpet. Does he even know what he is doing? I wish he would trip on that garden hose and break his neck. Such a disgrace to humanity and a threat to cat-ity.
7. Status updates - If you don't do it, you do not exist in the digital realm. Feeling bored with - wife, two kids, a playstation, 50 inch 3D HD LED TV, Blu-ray player, tons of blu-ray discs, beautiful weather outside, and a hell lot of money in the bank. But no one asks this dude to get up, wear a pant and take his kids outside to play! Or at least watch a movie with his family. Or just talk to them. Feeling sad - 100 people ask her what happened, be strong, stay calm, just chill. No one tells her to get a life! If you are really sad, you don't post on facebook! If you do, it’s a minor thing that should pass easily. I guess playing victim does feel good.
8. Unnecessary stuff - Moderate to heavily used. Anything other than the above. Showing off, sharing jokes and memes, sharing photos of friends and family, etc., etc., etc. Generally, the harmless part that can get harmful if not used carefully. 

How to unwind

5 ways to unwind

1. Intoxication - Get drunk or smoke weed. The high will unwind your stressed out brain. Con - You might have a hangover next morning. Oh, and watch your liver and heart, especially if your choice is booze
2. Vacation - Go on a vacation. Spend time away from all worries and do things that are stress-free and enjoyable to you. Con - Needs more planning and financial investment
3. Yoga - Yoga and meditation works wonders for most people who practice it. It can unwind you and will also improve your health. Con - Need to get professional training and is not advisable for the lazy
4. Arts - Draw a picture, paint something, sing a song, dance to your favorite music. All these things can entertain your mind and give your brain some relaxing exercises. Read yoga for the brain. Con - Well, not all of us are artistic and hence the end results might not be fully satisfying
5. Day-dreaming - Sit back, do nothing, and start a day-dream. You can punch your boss on his face, you can burn the office down, you can kick your colleagues, the opportunities are endless. Con - you could end up writing a blog that no one reads ;)

Lessons of Life #2311467

Facebook brings people closer. In real life, no one would be looking at the black mole on my nose so closely. They do it only on facebook.

Specially unique

What makes you special and unique?

Your appearance? They say even identical twins are only 80-85% similar. So you are truly unique in your appearance, regardless of how similar you are with your sibling or a total stranger. But that does not make you special.

Your genes? Oh yes, genes are truly unique. Like your appearance, there cannot be another person who has the same genetic code (whatever that means) as you have. But again, when you think of it, that’s nothing special.

Your personality? They (maybe not the same "they" I mentioned earlier, but you do get my point, don't you?) say your personality is only 20% based on your genes/heredity. Rest is all built upon your experiences. So a lot of other personalities can influence your personality. Okay, you kind of get it, right? I mean personality is not truly unique even though it can be special.

So then, what makes you specially unique? From my experience, I have realized that random acts of kindness and selfless actions for others make you specially unique for that one moment. And to me, that is all it becomes a man to achieve in his life. He can create moments of uniqueness, moments where he rises above all to do the "God-work". Oh yeah, now I kind of understand some of the unconventional theories around Gods and also why God is almost always in human form. Almost.

So the theory is that you cannot become God. But you can do the "God-work" for a moment and enjoy that. If you really start getting a high on that, you repeat the feat often and you will be called a living angel and posthumously, you might even get elevated to sainthood. How cool is that.

Now this describes why people don't do that often. Its God's job to fix things and we are not God. Wait a second! Could it be that we created this God figure to explain why we are not doing these good deeds? We say that God is the supreme power who controls everything, the great magician (oh yeah, magic!) and is so perfect that we human beings cannot even understand him with all his perfection. Gives us enough reason to not be God.

I do not believe in a humanoid God. God is not a being. Its that bit of goodness inside us. Just like the God particle in all matter (thank you CERN!), God is part of us. We do not understand this part as it is totally perfect (same goes for God particle). It takes a huge tunnel dug across two countries and a hell lot of money and time invested to get a glimpse of the God particle. But here, the real God is different. It does not take a lot of effort to get a glimpse. You see a homeless guy, you turn to the next coffee shop and buy him a sandwich, and voila! God is here! God does not do magic. God cannot do great things. God can only do small things with great love - said someone who kept bringing out the God inside her quite often.

So if God is within you, where is heaven? Looking up? We have already proven that it’s a few kilometers of thin air, some clouds, a layer of ozone, then empty space filled with meteors and comets, other planets, satellites (natural and man-made), billions of stars, and all the stuff that we do not know, but know that we might know later. So where is this heaven anyway? Indian mythology says heaven is where the God resides. And since God is within you, heaven is also within you. Oh did someone ask about Satan? Well, change all that I have said above to negative and evil things and replace God with Satan, heaven with hell. There is your answer. Simple and saves me time and paper (or space and keystrokes).

Living on the edge

The haziness in the air thickening

Makes me a poignant sluggard

Eerie as the nature is

I long for a shore placid

My boat hangs on the edge

Of a wave about to crash!

I wish for a storm so vicious

That rips the sails in a blow

And blazing strings of fire

Thundering down to the sea

Brisking my hands to act

Waking me up from a dream

But my hands tied to the helm

I peer blindly at emptiness

The moment lasts forever

Before the wave shatters

I live to tell the tale 

Of one agonizing wave

My boat climbs another

And leaves me wishing again!

Lessons of life #1322456

Think about consequences and next steps before making any decision. Being aware of consequences will help you avoid surprises and having next steps planned will give you the confidence that you do have some control over what is going to happen next. However, always bear in mind that things can still go wrong and you might have some surprises. Have an action plan for unwinding yourself in case you get a surprise later on. This can be anything as simple as a count of 1 to n. (Well, if the n is greater than 100, then you should really consider whether this works for you or not) Yoga and meditation can teach you tricks to practice which will keep you calm during stressful times. Google it! There are tons of information out there.

So if you know a bit about consequences, you know what you are going to do next, you know that there might be some surprises regardless of all these, and you also know what you can do to unwind and stop yourself from freaking out, you would not regret any decision that you take. The only flip side is that your spouse will be freaking out just seeing you calm and composed after a decision that you took went wrong. So if you have an action plan to help your partner unwind as well, that would be the icing on the cake.